Hymn to Winter Fairies

My holiday trip to the East of France lead me to an incredible land of winter and snow…. And inspired me this hymn to Winter Fairies.

“A mysterious train flies by at midnight, dark shadow upon white mantel ;
A winter tale from a strange land, magic is at work ;

The wind blows over the empty fields, ripples on the river ;
There’s something in the air, energy flowing round in a dance ;

Fairies of Snow.”

Hymn I to Belenos

First attempt to write an hymn to Belenos.

Belenos the Radiant
With the goldened hair
Invite me to dance
On a cheerful air.

Belenos my Lover
The outburst of laughter
A passionnate look
A warm embrace

Belenos my Father
Take me by the hand
Kiss me on the forehead
A reassuring smile

For there is no time for joy
Your blessing is everywhere
Hail to Thee dear Beloved
Belenos three times Fair

Belenos the Radiant

The sudden arrival of a new God in our practises is always stunning. But what I like best is that I’m so new to polytheism (2 years) that when a God I only approached through researchs come to me in reality, I feel like I’ve discovered something totally new. And that’s awesome.

I learnt quite a bit about Belenos when I applied for a gaulish polytheist course. I was our first encounter, and I enjoyed going through this new panel of Gods, Gods of my home (France) and not from somewhere else. And indeed their energy can be felt everywhere here, easier than other Gods. So as I read about Belenos, and learnt by heart, I also felt things. And I also prayed for him, several times, honoured him for his own festival (Beltain), and for two others two (during summer). But all this remained distant even if that was pretty good. I realised it when I met Morrigan, and saw the intensity of the bond we can have to Gods, and also when Dionysos entered my life in August 2010 (thanks to Sannion). I then realised that I may have passed some kind of new “level”. I developped the necessary sensitive faculties to be able to really feel the Gods presence and messages. So what I did in the past year before that evolution, that was marked by intellectual work, or at least isolated devotion. Because I loved and worshiped the Gods, but I could not truly feel them and hear them.

And Belenos chose this moment to show up, and I don’t know why… Because he was really innocent/naive in his approach, just like a child (the Immortal Young God that He is). It was in the middle of October, when the weather gets wetter and wetter (is it the correct form?), but we had some nice afternoon when the sun shines in the sky and warmth both the body and spirit. And Belenos came to me through a huge cloud : the sun made a fierce breakthrough in the sky, and through my window, suddenly warming up my cold body. So I lifted up my eyes, and thought… Morrigan ? was she answering my calls ? But no, it was different. And all so suddenly, I understood that it was male energy… and I heard the God’s cry of joys in my head. “Belenos”. That was really a marvellous moment that I cannot describe. But He was there, both in front of me (Sun) and in me (the warmth, his voice and laughter). And since that particular moment, he has made himself a place in my heart, and I did not left me. The Joy, Light and Warmth I can feel, they’re often (if not always) associated with Him. These energies that I had in me for a long time, now I understand they’re linked to him. And even if it’s teh cold period, and the dark period of the Year, He is definitely there, outside and in me.

And if I doubted it, the week after our encounter, he sent me messages to proove to me it was Him. He lent me his huge positive energy. He kind of let me know that he could also help i nthe underworld, even if he is God of the upper sphere (the eagle that went to me maybe his). He answered to my call full of doubt one night : in my sleep he went, and he blessed me and my partner, showing me his powers (positiveness, joy, warmth, true inconditional love…). It was absolutely amazing because it was so intense, but also so direct and clear. I was glad to know him for real this time. He revealed to me his Face, his Smile, his Powers that I had been only able to read and not feel. I was able to make his portrait for others, as the Ever Young God, Ever Cheerful, the Beauty Incarnate, the Absolute Lover, … Marvellous.

And what stroke me with a strong troubling force was this : I felt he was grateful, to me. How could that be ? He seems to be the kind of God who is very close to his worshipers, and intensely grateful for their devotion, being always ready and eager to help (and damn’ he’s strong!). It was almost as if he had told me that I was the tool of his new (re) awakening to the World, because my faith was strong and pure. He told me that he had felt abandonned and sleepy, that I had awakened him. That for this he was for ever grateful, and now ready to shine for the World, smiling, laughing, waiting to give his help and support.

Hard to keep it straight

After a tremendous beginning in my special worship of Morrigan, I encountered a “down” phase, which troubles me.

I know such thing happens, quite often maybe. But I was wishing I could avoid it. At first it disappointed me, but it then made me think : maybe it’s just a reminder that I’m only a human, and that I’ll remain one. It may also be because such intense work with the Gods need to be integrating, and for that one need an empty space (in the body, mind and spirit). So let’s call it a break. I need time to know what to do next, to strenghten the worship. But I think Morrigan understood something that I didn’t see coming : in fact I even need to develop my own polytheism. It’s my purpose, my wish, but I sort of let it go loose for the last past months, or at least, I explored quite randomly. I was very pleased to work with Dionysos, Diana, Artemis my old Guide, Persephone, Demeter, Meretseger (real help for my work with Death), and some others. It was good, but it lacked…. I don’t know, something like being grounded. So I settled down in my personal secular life in order not to be torn apart, and to get the proper serenity and stability. But this, as usual, often leads me to “stopping” my spiritual activities. It was a little scary, but I didn’t pay attention because it happened before, and I know that things move themselves and come back to normal later.

So during this period I tried to focus, to learn more about myself, my strenghs and weaknesses. I developped Qi Gong and Tai Chi practises which help me so much…. I’m working on feeling the energies of things (animals, humans, emotions, thoughts, pains, …) and do begin my apprenticeship in healing. At first I couldn’t see the point, but now I know I was right to do it and holding on : because now I begin feeling the energies involved in healing (my own, the others), and my hands feel better such things, I’m better at massage things, maybe I’ll be able to “manipulate” energies soon… I also settled the zen spirit of many of my practises (tea, drawing, contemplation), got back to my relationship with the runes, worked with animals and plants.

But after all this mess here I am, and now I’m back. Back to my polytheism. Ready to start over my worships with my gaulish pantheon. And that, Morrigan saw it coming long before me. Because Belenos went forth and present himself to me, and I think he has not left any second since. Today I realised that I have stuffs to do with Esus, starting praying and worshiping, but also starting a series of encounters (to know him), because He is the very right God I need for my works with the Underworld. As I realised reading Sarah Lawless. And so Morrigan may actually be respecting my own rhythm this time, and not pushing me… Just waiting for her own time to come. And I’m very glad about it. That we respect each other human or God, and work together as family. Damn’, I’m grateful.