This was originally the piece I wrote for Sannion’s coming book on Dionysos Ecstatic.
I feel weird, deeply humble by the attention that Dionysos has developed for me for the past 6 months. I did not look for him, I did not worship him regularly, and yet he came – insistently. I was a little scared at the beginning because he showed me his dark and savage face, a huge shadow for a God of the Wild – maybe it was his Lord of the Forest look. Needless to say, I was highly impressed. But then, it appeared that he had some things to say to me. So I struggled to find what, and finally I found Sannion’s blog; two week later I learned that he was delivering oracles for Dionysos himself. It was too huge a sign! I wrote down an email. And the mystery began to grow.
For indeed, the God, even if I knew him since my adolescence, was a stranger to me; I never really approached him since I became a polytheist. So why would he take an interest in me? Why now? Why would he help? I’ve not found all the answers yet, but it is true nevertheless that he stays along my spiritual path, as a kind of watcher. He seems to feel like putting me back on track when I’m lost, even if I don’t ask anything. I doubted, as anyone would have I guess. I was skeptical, I didn’t want to project my will on him. So I just observed, and didn’t draw conclusions about his presence. But I couldn’t help being disturbed, all the more so since the oracles I got from him (thanks to Sannion’s intermediary) were mind blowing. No, I mean, really, really, mind blowing. It was so accurate, deep, long term, very precise about what kind of person I am, and what life is ahead of me. I can’t give the details here, but Sannion can confirm the depth of his “prophecies”. Since September 2010, omens have been plenty to highlight what he wanted to tell; about my personal evolution, and about my path as a mystic pagan. It appeared that he showed me that my visions since adolescence were true, and all that I felt about many gods and spirits was true too. He helped me in the harsh process of lifting (up?) my fears I had been struggling with, helped me too grasping my personal self and potential, and, what was truly amazing, he helped me in my relationship with my Matron Goddess, Morrigan. The piling up was really awe-inspiring.
The Gods are supposed to be perfection, so I shouldn’t have been surprised by the clarity and deep truth he held about my life. And yet, coming from his mouth, a God that was not close to me, it was disturbing. And seeing that he had close relationship to some deities of my Celtic and Gaulish pantheon left me very puzzled, I would never have thought such inter-pantheon understanding was possible. Or maybe I wondered about the possibility, but it was far more intense to experience it than just assume. Such clarity and acuteness, about everything, was bewildering. He offered me such a right perception of Morrigan (and others), and knew our relationship so well from the outside, it was very humbling. And I still don’t know why he came, why he cares.
However, since then I have added him to my working pantheon, and from time to time I do offerings to him. It’s strange that we are not close and yet have a deep bond, sharing thoughts about my path. There’s a very powerful respect on both sides, but we look at each other from a distance. Despite these strange facts, it’s one of the most authentic and direct relationship I have to a God.
Valiel, French polytheist.